accepting criticism

October 27th, 2015

accountability can feel like an attack when it’s not


Sometimes other people ‘s lives and stories matter more than mine, and I emesh into problems that don’t concern me.  I’m learning to distinguish between my love of stories and my respect for other people’s privacy.  The important difference is to be clear about who I am from who other people are.

I shared a story of struggle that belonged to someone,  and a lady confronted me.  She made me understand that the story I told was not mine to tell.

True enough. I crossed a line, even though I didn’t speak the woman in the story’s name.  I apologize for overstepping personal boundaries.  Once again, I am reminded that all I have is my own experience.

‘Emeshing’ sounds like a simple concern, but I grew up in a home with no personal boundaries.  I did not learn to separate who I am from other people.  I have to unlearn old behavior.  I internalized other people’s issues like they were my own.  Sometimes I still cross an inappropriate line.

I try to be perfect, and it hurts when I make mistakes, and I get embarrassed.

Perfection is unrealistic and painful.  Until I accept that I make mistakes, my unrealistic goals do not make my life any smoother.  I feel separate from life’s flow.

Each day I practice patience by telling myself that life is a growth opportunity.  The goal of distinguishing my boundaries from other people’s will be a huge step toward my peace of mind.


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